When Jennifer Martin and her husband, Daniel, made their relationship open in 2016, they never imagined the polyamorous lifestyle. But their decision indeed brought another named TY. The trio, who doesn’t consider themselves a THROUPLE moved in together, along with Jennifer and Daniel’s two children, aged 9 and 11, respectively.
Daniel and TY do not date, and Jennifer [pictured] switches beds between the two.
She said of the relationship: “I’ve got two kids: D, who’s 11, and H, who’s 9. I also have two live-in partners. There’s Daniel, my legal spouse and the biological father of D and H, and TY, my unofficial spouse and co-parent. But we are not a Throuple; Daniel and TY do not date each other, and I switch beds between the two.”
TY [pictured left] was single when Jennifer and Daniel [right] met with him. Dating officially launched in 2018, and in 2020 right after the pandemic, the five moved into a new home.
Jennifer added: “We all had been spending a lot of time together before moving in, but as we all bunkered down at home together during the pandemic, we bonded in a really special way and spent so much time together. Soon, my kids began to think of TY as a parent, too.” She told INSIDER how the family began their journey with polyamory, with their children aged 6 and 3 at the time.
Jennifer claimed they joined a local polyamory group that was family-friendly and brought their children to be educated and meet other Polyamorous families, which helped normalize it.
“We didn’t think we’d ever lived with another partner, though. I worried that it would be irresponsible for my kids to get attached to other partners who might not end up sticking around. At first, we mostly dated people who were in similar situations to ours, who already had nesting partners – a partner with whom they live – and their own lives to worry about.” But indeed, this changed with the meeting with TY.
It turns out TY and Jennifer still have separate long-distance partners, while Daniel has a girlfriend in Richmond who doesn’t live with them.
She explained: “Since we date separately, there’s always someone at home with the kids to maintain a sense of stability. And though there are more schedules to juggle, we’ve gotten the hang of it over time. I’m a loyal devotee of Google Calendar, into which we enter all of our plans.” TY isn’t a biological parent to D and H, but he’s said to legally get guardianship and all assets in the unlikely event that something happens to Jennifer and Daniel.
“He has sworn to be there for my kids even if we break up, but so far, that seems unlikely; we are really happy and what we’re doing works for us.”
Speaking further on having multiple adults in the house while raising children, the mom-of-two stressed that someone is always around to watch them and there are plenty of people to do chores, especially since our children are older. Each of the family members has their specialties. According to Jennifer, she likes to create meal plans and cook. TY manages laundry; Daniel does the dishes, D takes out the trash, and H feeds the pets.
She alleged, “Oh, and another benefit to multiple adults under one roof? Three incomes.”
However, Jennifer revealed that when she casually dates, which is rare, she’s always up-front about family being her priority, her time being limited, and only serious partners getting to meet with her children. She insisted it’s not always ideal and that she has had a pretty bad breakup wherein a girlfriend, who was also a mom, cut off all contact between their families and ignored attempts to reach out.
Jennifer said of the failed affair: “Our kids were close, and it was rough. So now I’m very, very careful now about who I allow my children to get close to. We’re out as Polyamorous to our family, but I still get nervous about being open about this aspect of our lives to other parents. Luckily, we have kind, accepting friends who are parents, and we refuse to be closeted regardless of how many react.”